So here's an insight into what it's really like to be married to a chef:
1. Unsociable hours
3. They rarely cook at home
4. Health and Stress
- Make your own plans:
- I make sure I make plans to see friends, take part in hobbies and do my own thing. It's easy to moan that your chef is never home when you've been bored on your own all week!
- But I also try to be home for his split on the weekend and not to make plans on his evenings off
- When schedules clash:
- Making your own plans inevitably means that there will be times when your chef calls to say he has an unexpected night off when you've made plans to see a friend. Your friend may be understanding and not mind if you want to rearrange but sometimes you'll just have to accept things can't always be scheduled perfectly - better than making no plans just in case!
- Be organised
- We have a calendar to scribble down the main events of our week so we always have at least an idea of what the other is doing.
- If you need your chef to be off for an important event, make sure you give them plenty of notice so they can book holiday or work days off around it
- Mr H will always try to call or text me on his split, even just a quick hello. I'll also text him to tell him about my day even though he may not pick my messages up until he's home in the evening with me snoring in bed! It's important to make these small bits of effort to keep in touch.
- Make time
- Since we don't tend to get weekends together we try to book time away or days out together when we can. This may mean me taking time off work to coincide with his days off or us both booking time off to go away somewhere.
- Don't expect too much
- With a job like his, Mr H has little time at home. Even on his days off he's speaking to suppliers, writing menus and organising rotas. For this reason I've taken up most of the household jobs. The deal is that he looks after the car and I look after the house and household finances. We both do the gardening.
- BUT this is not an excuse for laziness!!
- His time
- I used to think that Mr H would want to spend all his free time with me and forget that actually he has friends, family and hobbies of his own. Whoopsies! So although it is important to spend quality time together, remember he needs his own space and time too.
- 10 minute moan
- We all like to unload our daily stress, either over coffee with a friend or a long phone call. Mr H doesn't get much opportunity for this so we have what's called a '10 minute moan' where we are allowed to moan about our day for 10 minutes before putting it to rest. Not only does it give you an insight into each others day but you both feel ten times better for it!
- Ultimately it's about making the most of any time you have together
- Savor trips together, skip parties for a night in
- Accept that somethings are beyond your control (like a table turning up late)
- Be patient
- And remember, absence makes the heart grow fonder!
Now, what to make for dinner?